dream

It was Saturday evening, August 15, 2020 when I had the dream.

Unfortunately, the dream story preceding the event is lost to memory.

I post it here to record it as I remember it:

Standing in a huge cylindrical vault-like encasement, I began to be PULLED UP.

In the dream state, I was not questioning or concerned about my surroundings – (a giant metal vault), instead I was only focused on the feeling of being lifted against gravity.

It was unfathomable … this is really happening?

I was scared. I was alone. My response was a yelping cry of fear as my body was being lifted, lifted, lifted … higher, higher, up, up and away.

The cries were heard by my husband lying beside me, and so he gently nudged me and I awoke.

***

I’ve contemplated a lot of potential meaning from this dream experience.

Is this a glimpse of what ascension will feel like?

Did I foresee a real-life event and sense the feeling of it?

Is this how the moment of physical death will be experienced?

Is this what the moments of being birthed feels like?

Perhaps I won’t find the answer right away. But I’m open to all possibilities. I trust the power of my intuitive self, and eventually the understanding of this experience will be revealed.

Apparently, the pull of God remains strong …

Like my garden plants – deep roots are grounding me, as the light is pulling me upward.

With you is the source of life; By your light we can see light.

Psalms 36:9

Bhakti (faith, devotion) and Kriya, (Action, to do)

work not for the food that perishes, but for the food that remains for everlasting life …

John 6:27

During my chemotherapy treatment yesterday I listened to a podcast sent to me by my dear friend, Zahara. The timing of the message felt so serendipitous, as always with relationships we seemingly “find” ourselves in.

I’ll share the link to the podcast below, but in summary, the orator revealed to me something that enhanced my worldly perspective:

Any “other” in our life (shared relationship) is there for you, not you for them.

What does that mean?

What we “see” outside our personal self is perfectly placed there (in harmony) to our (yet unrevealed) need for reconciliation, healing, awakening, purification, and steps to Knowledge (God).

“They” or “It” is there to mold us, shape us, teach us, offer us an opportunity to make choices for our own path to self-realization (one-ness and connection with God)

Does that mean we (our personal self) play no role in service to others?

NO.

Of course, our personal course of action in the world is meaningful – our service to other; however, again, it is actually for the same purpose.

Undeniably, it is ALL for the SAME PURPOSE.

Enlightenment has to translate into service if it is to be real and meaningful. You were sent into the world to do something specific. Knowledge within you knows what this is and is trying to guide you and move you into a position where you can recognize this and meet those individuals who will be a part of your greater service and accomplishment here. Along the way, knowledge is building your strength, building your discernment and building your courage.

Most of the spiritual work is deconstructing your confinement, your disabilities, your fantasies, your obsessions and your delusions to help you divorce yourself from your weakness and to unite you with your strength. It takes faith to do this because you don’t really know where it is taking you. You do not really know the outcome.

You do this because you know you must do this. Because in your heart, you know you must take this journey. Not to satisfy the goals of the mind, your ideas of enlightenment or to become a saint, a goddess, or any of this foolishness. You’ve taken the journey because you must. And this is what returns you to God because you are following what God has put within you to follow. You do not know where it is taking you. It is deconstructing that which is imprisoning you. It is building your strength, your confidence and your ability to discern the power and the presence of Knowledge within you.

Marshall Vian Summers

How can this help us navigate the physical world?

When you look outside your eyes at that other appearing in your life – in every relationship and circumstance, ask yourself, “How will this encounter polish the inner diamond of my heart so that I may better serve the will of God within me while I am here in this moment?”

I hope there is a crumb of inspiration in this writing … I truly hope to share what may serve another along the way.

The foolishness of this world, the seeming deceit, corruption, and insanity has taken my personal mind down to a level of sadness that has actually served to further ignite and strengthen the force within me to seek a course of action in planting seeds of LOVE in the mud of the world.

I devote this post In gratitude to ALL of my teachers along the way:

Cancer – husband – family and friends – pets – nature – food – and every stranger I will encounter in this world.

Namaste.

the unseen

Ultimately, we all share the same fear … THE FEAR OF DEATH.

Why?

Because it is unknown .

Because it is unseen.

Because we will no longer exist.

What if fear is NOT true?

What if we really don’t exist as truth in this form, but instead we are like dreamers in a dream?

If we believe in the dream, we take on the role of a player in the dream.

We are afraid of losing all of the dream-like experiences we call reality.

But if we acknowledge that we are the dreamers of the dream, we know we can only really Exist in the Creator of the dream.

When we establish an inner foundation – an inner stability – a trust that is always in the background of our knowing, we have access to an available well of certainty to remind us that the suffering of the world exists only in the egoic mind (the player in the dream), which finds itself separate from God (the Creator of the dream).

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Therefore, we do not give up, but even if the man we are outside is wasting away, certainly the man we are inside is being renewed from day to day. For though the tribulation (trial) is momentary and light, it works out for us a glory that is of more and more surpassing greatness and is everlasting, while we keep our eyes, not on the things seen , but on the things unseen. For the things seen are temporary, but the things unseen are everlasting.

vow

a solemn promise made to God to perform some act, make some offering or gift, enter some service, or abstain from certain things not unlawful in themselves. It carried the force of an oath.

New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures

I awoke from sleep with the words “double helix” in my memory.

I’ve been contemplating ..

Why are these words being downloaded into my consciousness?

I have very minimal knowledge about DNA, and have no clear understanding of its nature.

I sense that I’m being guided to look deeper. Somewhere in my genetic makeup there is a Vow.  A promise to remember the Source of Life … to place all my attention on it … to have knowledge of it.

PROVERBS 5:1-5

My son, pay attention to my wisdom.

Listen carefully (incline your ear) to my discernment,

So that you may guard your thinking abilities and safeguard knowledge with your lips

For the lips of a wayward (strange) woman drip like a honey-comb(b), and her mouth is smoother than oil

But in the end she is as bitter as wormwood

And as sharp as a two-edged sword

Her feet descend into death. Her steps lead straight to the Grave (Or “Sheol”, that is, the common grave of mankind.)

Look deeper. What is the meaning here?

This wayward woman is the Not Real, the False, the Illusory World.

This Illusory World’s temptations, desires and earthly temporary pIeasures will never fulfill our longing for Truth.

The Illusory World (Maya) has hands that are like prison chains. It pulls us in and we believe that we can’t get out (unless physical death occurs).

When we betray our True connection to God/Reality and place our belief and trust in the world of illusions, we commit adultery, which results in deception of one’s True Self (a forgetting of our true and natural identity as One with God).

***

A sage named Patanjali described an eight-fold path of yoga, otherwise known as “Ashtanga Yoga” (“ashta” meaning “eight”, “anga” meaning “limb” in Sanskrit).

these are the last 4 limbs of the path to Realization:

  • pratyahara- withdrawal of the 5 senses from external objects
  • dharana―Single pointed focus on an external object (the Seer observes the Seen).
  • dhyana―meditation, a concentrated awareness of the relationship between the subject and the object (The Seer and the Seen are aware of each other)
  • samadhi―The subject and object join as One, realization of non-separation, higher consciousness. (Seer and Seen are the same).

What is the significance in all of this?

The number 8 symbolizes infinity … The double helix is an infinite spiral … and something in me remembers that the world of illusions is infinitely unfolding in One Mind (God).

The pull of God

This time-stream I’m witnessing on planet earth feels kind of like the worst movie I’ve ever seen.

Like when you’re watching a movie and you want it to horrify you, enrage you, confuse you …

I wonder … Could it be that deep within our collective unconscious we want this scenario that’s seemingly happening?

And because we thought it, we desired it, we feared it, we imagined it,

it has to play out?

Anything we can possibly dream up – the most auspicious and the most ominous

Sooner or later it’s gotta show up – Every potential will be manifested

What the hell is going on here?

Are we lost and hopeless? Is there anything that we can do? What on earth is happening? Is anything true? Is this all a concocted game of insanity without purpose? What the hell am I doing here?

Then I relax. Breath. Close my eyes.

I feel alone in my uncertainty.

I hold the moment of silent inward connection.

Through what feels like my heart’s voice, I can feel what I intuit to be God’s (Absolute) pull.

It pulls so strongly at my heart that I can’t help but feel Certain that this pull is the most important thing to place my attention on. It’s voice silently informs me that I should spend every waking (and sleeping) moment in Time in devotion to Serve Its purpose, even though I don’t understand it.

This pull wants me to Trust It’s Certainty.

It says, Don’t ever stop contemplating my mystery and my omnipresence. This is your highest purpose.

And even when I forget, and feel lost in uncertainty, this pull of God continues to yearn for me to remember.

…you should no longer go on walking just as the nations also walk, in the futility ( emptiness; vanity) of their minds. They are in darkness mentally and alienated from the life that belongs to God, because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the insensitivity (dulling) of their hearts. (Ephesians 4:17, 18). Let a rotten word not come out of your mouth, but only what is good for building up as the need may be, to impart what is beneficial to the hearers (Ephesians 4:29)

I am pulled to remember that this paper world is not Real. We have forgotten how to connect with nature (God) and our materialism has become the only God we know. Of course, it looks bleak when we place our trust in what is Not True.

I feel the pull …. I feel the pull … I feel the pull of my heart strings.

Divine mystery

“If there’s no sense of the sacred, then there’s something we’re not paying attention to.”

Adyashanti

When I was a child, about 4 or 5 years old, I developed a fever.

I can actually remember that day. Sitting on the top stair of our new suburbia high ranch home. I recall the sense of being deliriously on fire.

Eventually, I guess the fever subsided but I can’t remember the details.

And then the seizures started. My body would convulse – like electric jolts from the center of my spine out through my legs and arms.

My poor parents thought I was possessed. (It was 1964).

Many doctor visits later, and no conclusive diagnosis, my parents resorted to a hypnotherapist to evaluate me. I remember that day vividly (but this is a story for another forum … ).

Finally …. someone with medical knowledge must have suggested a spinal tap and brain encephalogram …

and the diagnosis was eventually revealed to my parents:

Your child has encephalitis. She must have contracted it from a mosquito bite on your recent family visit to the Jersey shore.

This was the story given to me which would remain in my head for the next 56 years. How I wish I could go back in time and ask the doctors:

“DO YOU THINK MAYBE THE LOAD OF PRE-SCHOOL VACCINATIONS GIVEN TO MY 5-YEAR-OLD SELF MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH SEIZURES AND ENCEPHALITIS?????!!!!”

Recently, I googled the required vaccinations for preschoolers in 1964, and this was listed as the required immunizations:

Smallpox, Diphtheria*, Tetnus*, Pertussis*, Polio (OPV), Measles, Mumps, Rubella (* Given in combination as DTP)

I’ll never know what vaccines I actually received. I have no records. However, I do remember Mom taking me to the school gymnasium to get the dreaded “shot” in the arm.

Actually, the point of this story is not my anger that a childhood vaccination may have caused encephalitis and seizures.

The point is …

Whatever happened to me in 1964 … as awful as it may have looked at the time for my worried sick parents – as horrific it may be that a vaccine potentially could have killed me –

Was the Sacred present even in that life event?

Is the Sacred ever NOT present?

I am finding this line of inquiry helpful, especially now …

It reminds me to pay attention to what is unseen but Always Present.

All things that have been a source of pain, discomfort and disassociation, when brought into service to one power-which is the One Power-will then become vehicles of expression serving a greater purpose.

Marshall Vian Summers

the word

The issue of freedom is very important so we can embrace the right or lose it. Where the mind is concerned, I opted many years ago to drop out of the mainstream world and later to get rid of my TV. I only listen to the classical radio station which is now commercial-free in my area and I don’t subscribe to any newspapers or magazines. Still, how can I know when my mind is perceiving, when it is thinking, and when it is merely regurgitating? For instance, if I tell you the world is round, I have no personal skills that qualify me to such an opinion. I am therefore merely reflecting what is accepted as truth in today’s world but this same mind might have subscribed to the flat earth theory hundreds of years ago. For instance, I can see an image of the Earth from a satellite or look at an antique map. Depending on the images shown to my mind and the text accompanying the images, I form my understanding, but the fact is still that without any personal experience, I can only reflect what my mind has memorized. Exactly how a mind retains knowledge is unimportant in this context. The knowledge itself is simply not original and can only be authenticated by reference to consensus.

Ingrid Naiman

I recognized a long time ago, that nothing we actually say is true.

The “word” is a representation, a copy, a symbol, of Sound, Vibration, Frequency.

This recognition has often left me

disappointed … confused … appalled … disgusted … frustrated

and sometimes this recognition has evoked

liberation … joy … enlightenment … inspiration

As I write this, the light has appeared, it is no longer nighttime (I’ve been up since 4 AM). Something woke me, and said:

Janet, you know the Truth. Yes, there appears to be evil (dark) and good (light) and yin (cool) and yang (hot) and everything in between.

And still, I AM is the only Reality – infinitely – no beginning, no end.

Every time you forget this, STOP, BE STILL, FEEL your breath, inhale all the suffering, pain, ignorance, evil and then exhale FORGIVENESS, LOVE, COMPASSION for all humanity.

And another day begins …..

FREEDOM

Sometimes I feel like a motherless child
A long way from my home

Freedom freedom freedom freedom
Freedom freedom freedom freedom

Sometimes I feel like I’m almost gone
A long, long, long, way, way from my home

Clap your hands
Hey, yeah

I got a telephone in my bosom
And I can call him up from my heart
I got a telephone in my bosom
And I can call him up from my heart

When I need my brother, brother
When I need my father, father

When I need my sister, sister

When I need my mother, mother
Hey, yeah

Richie Havens

freedom

“While they are promising them freedom, they themselves are slaves of corruption, for if anyone is overcome by someone, he is his slave.”  2Peter 2:19

“Of all things that human beings fear (and they are a timorous race) the one that strikes them with abject and utterly demoralizing terror is freedom. They are so afraid of it for other people that almost simultaneously they come to dread it for themselves. So they devise systems of checks and balances, restraints, moral sanctions, conventions and moral mass-expectations of one kind and another; they are willing to go to the most fantastic lengths in restriction and repression; but the one thing that they never yet have shown the courage to try is simple freedom, which some day they will have the happy surprise of discovering to be the only thing that really works.” A Matter of No Curiosity, Albert Jay Nock

I witness the insanity.

Our veiled hearts and minds, it’s heartbreaking.

Our Home is not a physical structure or a material plane or dimension.

We’ve lost that Knowledge.

Hence, FEAR.