Transition states of consciousness

A Hathor Planetary Message Through Tom Kenyon

(I copied the text below directly from Tom Kenyon’s email message. It’s lengthy, but so worth the time to read, and read again and again. Each time something new may resonate for you, as it has for me. Enjoy…..)

Definitions

Chaotic Nodes are clusters of chaotic events. According to the Hathors, Earth has entered a Chaotic Node and, as a result, we can expect ever-increasing levels of chaos—including but not limited to earthquakes, volcanic activity, aberrant weather patterns, ecological distress, as well as economic, social and political turmoil.

Transition States of Consciousness are what the Hathors call the in-between places when a major loss has occurred and we find ourselves temporarily poised between an old reality that has passed away and a new reality that has not yet fully formed.

Perceptual markers are a term the Hathors use to describe how we make sense of our world and navigate through our lives using our five senses.

The Message

By their very nature Chaotic Nodes tend to generate transition states of consciousness. Transition states of consciousness emerge when perceptual markers disappear. And when this occurs you enter a null zone in which your old reality no longer exists, or has changed radically, while your new reality has not yet come into existence.

Due to the fact that you have entered an even more intense phase of the Chaotic Node, we wish to share with you our views regarding transition states, in the hopes that you will be able to utilize this knowledge for your own benefit.

For our purposes we can divide transition states into three primary categories: 1) personal transition states, 2) collective transition states and 3) physical death.

Personal Transition States

Let us turn our attention to personal transition states first, for your personal perception is the pivotal point around which your perceived reality operates.

Your perception of reality is fundamentally a personal creation. It is influenced by the collective perception of your culture, time, place and circumstance, but fundamentally your perception of what is real and not real is a creation—your creation.

Your perception of reality depends upon habits of perception, if you are like most persons. You are used to experiencing certain realities in your life and these tell you where you are, so to speak. You wake up in the morning and you look to the clock and the collective perception of time is immediately before you. Your choice to engage this illusion, or not, is a personal one. Indeed, one of the signs of spiritual mastery is the ability to navigate cultural illusions successfully while clearly understanding their nature.

When a situation in your personal life shifts dramatically there is a tendency for the perceptual markers to disappear or re-organize themselves.

Let us present one possible scenario. If you have worked at the same job for many years you have built your life around the demands of this position. You eat lunch at a certain time. You return home at a certain time. You interact with others in specific ways, tailored to fit the demands of your job.

If that job were suddenly removed, unexpectedly, those perceptual markers would disappear. There would be no need to get up at a certain time, eat at a certain time, return home at a certain time, and the people you interacted with for the bulk of your waking hours would no longer be available to you.

This situation is inherently disorienting for most people. Again, the perceptual markers have disappeared.

The same phenomenon occurs when any radical shift in your personal life takes place. If a relationship that is important to you suddenly ends the perceptual markers of that relationship disappear, and you enter the transition state of consciousness.

If you have a health crisis and your physical life is affected in radical ways the perceptual markers disappear, and this can be disorienting. You have entered a transition state of consciousness.

As the Chaotic Node increases in its intensity more and more persons will experience the shock waves of their old reality crumbling before them. What was certain in their lives is now uncertain. What was solid ground is seen to be no longer solid. We mean this both figuratively and literally.

There is another wave of transition states that is emerging from this Chaotic Node. It is already affecting many persons, but its affects will spread out in consciousness much like a tsunami.

This particular transition state has to do with the collapse of the collective lies of your culture. Increasingly more and more of you will see behind the shadow play; you will sense the puppet masters, and although their identities may elude you, you will see with increasing reality that aspects of your culture are a manipulation, a limitation, and in many cases, downright lies.

The lie that we are speaking to here is not the lie of economics, the lie of wars, or the lie of confining religions, but the lie of your identity—a lie that ensures your imprisonment. This lie is the belief and cultural assertion that you are nothing more than a physical human being and that there are, in fact, no other realms of being beyond your earthy experience.

The recognition of this lie is a harbinger of personal freedom, but in its beginning stages it can be quite disorienting. This is because multidimensional experiences are so different from your earthly day-to-day experiences. If you find yourself marooned between your earthly and multidimensional life, you have entered a transition state of consciousness.

Our purpose in sharing this information is to suggest a practical course of action during transition states of consciousness.

When you personally enter a powerful transition state you might, like many human beings, remain stuck in overwhelm. Many individuals find the shock of realizing that their perceptual markers have disappeared, along with the reality that they assumed to be real, deeply disturbing.

Due to the fact that time is accelerating—and by this we mean more events taking place in less time—remaining in a state of shock or overwhelm is a psychological indulgence which you cannot afford. The essential point we wish to convey here is that regardless of the nature of the transition state, whether it is personal in nature having to do with changes in your personal life, or due to recognizing your cultural manipulation—you are the creator of your reality.

You may have stories to explain why suddenly your life is bereft, but these are just stories. You may blame other persons, situations, or institutions for your problem, but this is misplaced responsibility. Your stories may be true and there may be other persons, situations or institutions to blame, but when you have entered a transition state of consciousness, you are at the central vortex of a powerful creative process. There is no reason or need to cry over “spilt milk” as one of your folk sayings goes. What is lost is lost. What is gone is gone.

Now the central question becomes, “What will you do?”

Will you remain stunned, in shock, in overwhelm, anger and sadness? Or will you step into your identity as a creator of your life?

To those of you who choose to remain in lower states of consciousness, we have no comment.

Our comments are for those of you courageous enough and bold enough to step into your identity as creators. If you are one of these, here is what we suggest.

When everything disappears, meaning the perceptual markers of your former reality, understand that you have entered into a void point.

A void point is a critical transition between an old reality and a new one. That which was, has ended. Instead of regretting the loss, you accept the void. This is, for many persons, a challenging undertaking, because in the void point there is nothing that can be done. You must simply be a witness to it, and to yourself, for in this no-man’s land there are no perceptual markers.

Be careful what new markers you put into place, for these ideas and beliefs will be the stars in the new sky of your mind, and you shall navigate your way into these new times by the stars (thoughts and beliefs) that you have placed in the heavens of your own consciousness. So be wise when you go about creating new stars, our fellow navigators of the Mystery.

Collective Transition States of Consciousness

The human collective, from our perspective, is currently like an immense cosmic serpent shedding its old skin, writhing and twisting, scraping off old encumbrances. Some of these take the form of economic turmoil. Some of them are political in nature. Some of them are the collapse and transformation of cultural institutions. And some of these writhings and twistings are related to earthquake and volcanic activity, as well as aberrant weather patterns.

As natural and manmade disasters increase, more and more of you will find yourselves entering transition states of consciousness. Obviously those who experience an earthquake, volcano or destructive weather directly are the most prone to enter transition states, but those of you who are empathic in nature can experience the brunt of a natural or manmade disaster as if you were physically present.

Indeed as the veil that separates human consciousnesses from one another dissolves, more and more of you will experience the changes taking place in the world at a visceral level.

We now wish to address the question of a new creation for those of you who may find yourself in the aftermath of a natural or manmade disaster, such as an earthquake, a volcanic eruption, or destructive weather patterns.

If the destructive force is strong enough, the perceptual markers of your former reality may no longer exist. Your home or place of business may no longer be there. You may find yourself dealing with shortages of food and water, and there are any number of variables that can come together to create a state of shock and overwhelm.

We wish to be very clear in what we are about to say. Shock and overwhelm in the face of disasters are a natural mammalian response, and if you are to transcend and transform the moment you must reach upward to higher dimensions of your own existence, your own being, to those realms of consciousness that are beyond time and space.

To the extent that you are able to incorporate the transcendent aspects of your being as part of the equation for your survival, you will be able to mitigate the shock and overwhelm.

The central feature that needs to be identified in the midst of chaos, any form of chaos, is the portal of opportunity.

This opportunity for survival or for a new life may present itself in ways you do not expect. This is because the perceptual markers are no longer in place and your consciousness may not recognize an opportunity when it presents itself.

There is a deep-seated human habit, or tendency, that wishes to conform new realities to those of the past. This would be an unfortunate habit to engage in these situations.

There is much we could say about the hyper-dimensional realities involved in choice making during chaotic events, but we wish to “cut to the chase” and give that which will be most practical. Perhaps some other time we can share with you our philosophical musings about your infinite nature and the infinite possibilities that reside within you. However, for now, let us be a little simplistic and give you a formula to recognize and create opportunities for new life and a new destiny when they present themselves to you.

Assuming that you have entered a transition state of consciousness and that you have befriended the void point and are more or less comfortable with the great uncertainty of your situation, this is what we suggest.

Be curious and expect miracles.

By entering a state of curiosity you engage an aspect of your mind that is free to move unfettered by expectation. It becomes very much like the mind of a child, and it is this innocence—which is not the same as childishness—that allows you to enter a vibratory state of consciousness, which greatly benefits you.

By holding the expectation of miracles you release the power of creation within you, and to the extent that you accomplish this you will find increasing incidences of serendipity, coincidences of benefit and unexpected treasures, whether they be physical in nature or mental and emotional.

This combination of curiosity about what will happen next joined with an expectation of miracles will move you rapidly from the void point to a new life, a new creation, regardless of what might be happening for those around you.

During collective transition states of consciousness it is helpful to remember that each person is the creator of his or her own reality, and in the midst of chaos people will make different choices and enter different personal realities.

Do not be swayed by those who enter lower vibratory realms. You cannot save them from themselves. Look upward and live upward with curiosity and an expectation of miracles, and even in the gravest of situations miracles can, and will, occur for you.

Physical Death

One of the greatest difficulties for embodied beings is the transition state of consciousness you call death. This is due to the fact that all perceptual markers, including the five senses, disappear. If a person identifies solely with his/her material existence, he or she will find this transition state to be most difficult. This is because what she or he identified with no longer exists.

Although the physical world continues on, there is no input into consciousness from the five senses. It is as if the world has vanished and the body along with it. The great I Am, the central feature of transcendent consciousness, no longer receives information from the body, the five senses, or the external world. This can be deeply disturbing and disorienting for someone who has not directly experienced the other realms of his or her being.

Metaphorically speaking, you are like a vast tree, a Tree of Life, with many branches and many, many leaves and blossoms, and your current physical existence is just one of these leaves and one of these blossoms.

When a person passes through the transition state of consciousness you call death there are several options. If you are in a spiritual tradition the central figure of which is a guru, avatar or savior, you can follow the path of this being into the vibratory realm of his/her consciousness. In some religions this is known as heaven.

If you follow the path of a guru, avatar or savior understand that you are entering into his/her heaven, her/his vibratory attainment, and by necessity you enter also into his/her limitations in consciousness.

From our perspective the universe is infinite in nature, and by this we refer not to external space but to the interdimensional realities of your universe, and there is no single being in existence, from our experience, who understands and embraces all that is.

If, however, you wish to join your guru/avatar/savior in the death realms we have a few suggestions. One is to mentally call upon his/her name. This is an ancient understanding encapsulated in the Egyptian term Ren, meaning name. When you call upon the name of a spiritual being an aspect of him/her is compelled to move toward you.

If, in that moment of encountering your guru/avatar/savior, he or she deems you worthy, you will be taken by him/her into his/her heavenly realm.

For those of you in eastern spiritual traditions there are mantras connected with specified deities. Chanting these mantras mentally during death, or in the death realms, has the same effect.

For those of you who are not part of a spiritual tradition that follows a guru, avatar or savior, then the transition state of consciousness called death offers other possibilities.

As with the other two transition states of consciousness, the death realm has a void point, and its dominant features are stillness (silence) and darkness. All possibilities exist within the Void, but no actuality is in existence. It is like the acorn of an oak tree. The oak, the giant tree itself, is potentially within the acorn, but it does not yet exist.

So when you find yourself in the Void, which you will recognize by the fact that you are utterly alone in darkness and utter stillness, know that you are in the central nexus of your creative powers.

What you choose to create next will determine the course of your destiny and what worlds you will inhabit or realms of existence you will reside in. This is a critical juncture.

Many persons frightened by the darkness move to the light prematurely. And what they do not realize is that in their yearning they create the light. A portal opens before them, like a tunnel, and they can move into this tunnel of light, encountering those they have known before, thereby entering back into embodiment or other vibratory realms of existence without having fully understood the consequences. This is certainly one option open to you, and one that is often taken.

Another option, however, is to remain at the void point, residing in the Void itself, becoming aware of your Self as pure consciousness—transcendent to all phenomena.

If you reside in this state of awareness long enough without the need to create something, you will discover your identity as the great I Am. And from this point of awareness you can choose the circumstances of your embodiment. You can choose the worlds you will inhabit or the realms of consciousness where you will reside.

This latter method gives you the greatest opportunities, though it is the most difficult for most people. And the reason for this difficulty has to do with the fact that most humans find it uncomfortable to not have a body. The yearning for a body and the experience of the material world often draws a person from the Void prematurely.

In summation, due to the intensifying phases of the Chaotic Node many of you will find yourselves in transitional states of consciousness. Regardless of what level you find yourself engaged in, whether it be your personal life, the collective experience, or the transition state you call death, know that you are the creator of your reality.

The Hathors
April 20, 2011


Tom’s Thoughts and Observations

I personally find this message to be stunningly eloquent and a vast storehouse of information. I have read and re-read this message several times, and each time I discover something new. There is, indeed, much to be read between the lines in this communication.

I especially liked the Hathors’ statement…

“Be careful what new (perceptual) markers you put into place, for these ideas and beliefs will be the stars in the new sky of your mind, and you shall navigate your way into these new times by the stars (thoughts and beliefs) that you have placed in the heavens of your own consciousness. So be wise when you go about creating new stars, our fellow navigators of the mystery.”

At the level of our collective mind, I think our mythic realities are changing. The old stars, those thoughts, beliefs and presuppositions about reality that have guided us as a culture for millennia seem now to be dimming, not to mention that they have led us in directions many of us no longer wish to go.

The collective ship of our culture seems to be plying through the waters of the Great Mystery with little regard for the sacredness of this planet or life upon it. But even as our collective vessel sails through the Great Mystery, seemingly without awareness, it (the ship) and we owe our very existence to the Mystery itself. This very odd duality seems, to me, either amusing or tragic, depending upon what mood I am in, and how connected I am or disconnected I have become from the Mystery itself.

One of the ironies of our situation is that the crew of this vessel, those who make it sail, through an investment of their life-force, creativity and, in some cases, blood sweat and tears, are no less than you and me, and all the other nearly seven billion humans alive on this exquisite planet. We are—all of us—crewing this vessel, regardless of our personal situation, our life station or our beliefs.

There are those in the New Age community who say, and have been saying for years now, that we are near Unity, and that the Golden Age is just around the corner. I do not share this perception.

We are all in the same boat together, whether we like it or not, and it seems to me that our crew is polarized. There are many who insist that the paradigms of greed, arrogance and usurpation are the true reference points for our sextants.

Others of us, however, are sensing that we are headed in the wrong direction—that we can no longer ravage this planet and its life (both human and other-than-human). For us, there are new stars in the sky of our minds. And we are setting our sextants clearly upon these cosmic beacons.

How it will all turn out is anybody’s guess. But I am encouraged by a silent mutiny I see happening all around me.

Many of us crew members, and I suspect that if you have read this far you may be one of them, are silently taking action to turn our collective vessel (i.e. our cultural madness) around or at least slow it down.

Some of us are pulling out our sextants and are pointing out new stars to those around us. We do this by living the change we wish to see. We do this by having the courage to live by a new Earth-reality that we sense is possible. We do this by extending kindness to each other.

And when necessary, we do this by standing our ground. I am reminded in this of a grass roots movement in some of the world’s poorest countries to preserve the use of non-hybrid seeds—seeds that produce new seeds when crops are harvested—rather than succumb to international economic interests that would enslave the poorest of the Earth to buy new seeds whenever they wish to feed themselves and their families.

As I write this, I am nearly weeping at their courage to stand up against the Titans that have set the course for our collective vessel through greed, arrogance and an utter disregard for the sanctity of life.

As difficult and as challenging as these times are both for individuals and the collective, I think there is hope in the uncertainty that we are facing. I say this because the human spirit has sometimes risen to heights when faced with dire uncertain times.

If the Hathors are correct, all of us will face numerous transition states of consciousness before our time on Earth has ended. The perceptual markers of our old reality are being displaced. How we deal with the loss of our perceived reality and the old world will determine the next cycle of Earthly existence for humanity.

And for us individually, what we choose to create in the transition states of our lives will determine the realms of consciousness that are opened to us.

I wish you, my fellow crew members and those whom you love, safe passage through these turbulent times. But regardless of what happens, regardless of where and in what situations we find ourselves upon this perilous journey, let us remember that we are—above all else—creators of our own reality.

There are new stars in the sky and new worlds to discover. Be bold. And have a good journey.



Part Two
And now back to the present…
 
My dreamtime communication with the Hathors occurred sometime around five in the morning. As the lucid dream unfolded, I physically felt a gentle yet electrical-like sensation at my crown chakra and sensed a rotating sphere of scintillating white light above my head.
 
I recognized this as what the Hathors refer to as The Sphere of All Possibilities. The Sphere is a way to communicate a vast field of information in a very efficient manner. The Sphere contains a near infinite number of radiant points of light. each point of light representing a possible/probable outcome to any situation.
 
In this case, the Sphere was a complex gestalt of personal, collective and planetary transitions.
 
The Hathors asked that the message of August 2020 be titled Transition States into New Realities because we are transitioning into multiple realities simultaneously.
 
Within the Sphere at my crown, I saw what was reminiscent of Jacob’s dream from the Old Testament in which he saw angels descending and ascending on a ladder from heaven.
 
However, in this dream image, all manner of sentient beings (not just human) were moving upward or downward within the Sphere. My clear sense of this image was that it represented a mass exodus of beings (both corporeal and non-corporeal) from the lower vibratory realms of existence to the higher realms and simultaneously, another exodus of beings was moving downward into the lower vibratory realms.
 
And then the following words resounded through my dreaming mind. “You are the magnetic attractor of your own destiny. Do not be swayed by those moving downward. Do not be hypnotized by their fear and contraction into the lower realms. Rise up and take flight into the upper worlds.”
 
Given the current state of affairs, I found these words to be very poignant and timely. This dreamtime communication from the Hathors is a call to presence. For those of us striving to live upward, the dream is full of information about both the exhilaration and hardships of living in the higher realms while many around us seem to be hell bent on moving downward into the lower expressions of the human spirit. The last words of my dream also spoke volumes… Rise up and take flight into the upper worlds.
 
In the midst of the growing global carnage around the current pandemic as well as escalating social unrest, we have before us an unprecedented opportunity (actually I call them FGOs or Fucking Growth Opportunities) to spread our wings, metaphorically speaking, and fly upward even in the midst of chaos.
 
Final thoughts
 
After my dream concluded, the Hathors strongly suggested that I listen to the Spatial Cognizance Sound Meditation, which was given during my last public Hathor Intensive that was titled Multiverse, before the pandemic shut all public gatherings down.
 
This sound meditation is a powerful means to access the openness of the transpersonal self and to our own innate transcendent nature that is not bound by the limitations of time, place and circumstance. During my post-dream meditation, the Hathors had me place my attention at my crown center while imaging The Sphere of All Possibilities as a sphere of white light above my head.
 
If you wish to plumb the greater depths of the Hathors’ insights about Transition States, I think you may find this sound meditation to be both fascinating and enlightening. You can find the sound mediation in the Listening section of the website (www.tomkenyon.com), free of charge for your own personal use, under the title Spatial Cognizance Meditation.
 
And finally, the Hathors asked me to mention the Heart Portal Sound Meditation that they gave in their last Planetary Message. It is, according to them, a tremendous ally for those of us seeking to move upward through the chaotic times that are upon us (and will be for some time to come). They suggest this particular mediation because it has a dual purpose as it is a means of spiritual purification and a way to access other realms in the upper worlds. You can also access this, free of charge for your own personal use, in the Listening section of the website.
 
Blessings to you, your loved ones and all your relations
May your flight upward be serendipitous and filled with a grace that knows no bounds
 
Tom Kenyon
August 17, 2020

revelation

Outdoors

In the sunshine

At the park

Near the lake

Touching water

Later at home

A cup of coffee

And a quiet contemplation

With God … Experiencing LIFE …As ME

God Becomes ME

To experience Consciousness

God comes through LIFE

Human Forms, All Forms

And Exists

To have an Experience

An Infinite Potential of EXPERIENCES

God gives its ESSENCE to ME … To LIVE as I choose

God’s Existence is profoundly neutral

Finding Purpose … IN … and AS … and THROUGH

Each and Every Life Form

Ease and Joy became present in my deeper knowing of this. It quickly fluttered, but I script it here for remembering later.

I AM … The light of the world

A spiritual anarchist by nature, I find joy in exploring the potentiality of language to make attempts at expressing God’s Infinite Presence. Recognizing one’s true nature is our path to peacefulness. This true nature exists within all of us, just waiting for that holy instant to be seen or heard or felt – once found, this peacefulness transcends all fear.

“This consciousness literally IS a light to the world.

It lights up one’s whole experience of Being.

In the same way that awareness or consciousness is not an experience but allows ALL experience, consciousness is a light, a light that sees all the lights of the world but is not itself a visible light.

That’s why when I say consciousness lights up the whole world, yes, but it’s a different kind of light.

It innately transcends experience, good, bad, happy, sad.

That’s why in the east they would often talk about emptiness.

You are an intangibility at your essence, your core.

You’re here, and we think that I am here as an entity, but actually if we really look closely – the sense of I am here, I exist, there really isn’t a fixed, stable, entity to it. That image can exist within your experience, of course, but there’s something more primary. Its ungraspable.

You are not a thing.

This thing-ness happens, of course, but YOU – when you really follow it right into that immediacy – you just sort of disappear into intangibility. There’s nothing graspable there, and yet you are.

In the bible when God was asked to give an accounting of himself or herself, ‘WHAT ARE YOU GOD?’

All God would say is, I AM, I AM WHAT I AM

And that’s sort of the expression or the confession of your true nature.

I AM.”

Excerpt from Adyashanti, March 14, 2020 broadcast: 1:02:28

it lies in the knowing of one’s own being as it truly is

In my silent sitting (and silent listening) this evening, I was inspired to record these Infinite verbs:

  • Sense, Feel, Realize
  • See, Touch, Know
  • Discern, Empathize, Care
  • Listen, Embody, Act

Speaking, reading and hearing these words felt healing and comforting, as if providing a needed pathway.

As if they hold a secret key to a truer way of being.

Although I don’t think there’s really any secret. As my beloved Adyashanti so wisely states,

“Here’s the secret spiritual teaching: The secret teaching is – THERE IS NO SECRET TEACHING because there’s nothing that can take the place of you or I taking that continual plunge into the unknown inside of us. Nothing can take the place of that.”  

Well I’ve been taking some deep plunges. It was an emotional day (maybe post chemo induced, maybe sheer compassion for the people in my life who are suffering).

Why is it that witnessing the suffering of others saddens me more than my personal suffering?

Is it because I feel so helpless about it?

None of us are exempt from experiencing and/or witnessing suffering: Our own suffering, our parents , our children, our friends, our mates, strangers.

Can I fix, repair, resolve, heal someone else’s suffering?

I certainly want to.

Is sincere love for another being a valuable antidote for their suffering?

I do trust that love has more powerful effects than we have yet come to realize.

But even with our love offerings, as heartbreaking as this realization is, I intuitively trust this as innate truth:  

The “moment” a separate-self-consciousness is thinkable, the misunderstanding of who and what you are generates inescapable suffering.

And so many of us have realized this cycle of suffering for what it is –

So why do we continue to perceive/believe/endure this suffering?

(What would the masters from our ancient scriptures say? -Buddha, Jesus, Lao Tzu, etc., etc.).

Adyashanti brings some clarity to this question:

“When Buddha was asked what he obtained from his supreme enlightenment, he said ‘I have obtained absolutely nothing’. What does that mean? Clearly, something for him had changed, something very fundamental.

He called it nirvana. But he also said he hadn’t obtained anything. He had means of finding out the truth for himself. Didn’t really have a doctrine to take the place of whatever we think we know. It was really a means of realization and a means of living it. (And I’m not trying to propagate the Buddhist teaching). There’s something in human being that searches for knowable, conceptual terms, and feeling secure and solid and stable, yet it never works out that way.

Because living from a place of certainty and stability is destabilizing us. Because every moment of life is a flow. You never know what’s coming at you. If we’re living with a rigid conclusion, to that extent we’re not really flowing … there’s not You and Life … There’s just LIFE.”

Aha ….. So Buddha realized the Truth, but he had to be able to LIVE it: Listen, Embody, Act.

I am feeling less sad and more empowered already.

So can I Discern, Empathize, Care without the need to control the outcome?  

Okay, it’s way past my bedtime. Enough mind chatter – let me end with some wisdom from Rupert Spira:

“It takes some time to understand that the essential cause of our suffering is the fact that we have overlooked who or what we essentially are.

Most people feel that the source of peace and happiness is to be found in the acquisition of some kind of objective experience, however subtle that experience may be. Most people need to be failed a number of times, over and over again, by objective experience before they are open to the possibility, either intuitively or by the suggestion of a friend, that the peace and happiness for which they seek doesn’t lie in objective experience but lies in the knowing of their own being as it truly is.

Now what is it that makes some people open to this understanding as opposed to others who no matter how much they suffer are still not open to  it, I don’t know. Of course, the theory of reincarnation explains this but for some people they only have to really suffer once to realize I have invested my happiness in this object or this relationship and its let me down. Every object and relationship, sooner or later will let me down.

Some people only need to taste that failure once or twice before they are open to this new possibility. Other people suffer bitterly throughout their lives, and they’re not open to this possibility even when it is made available to them.”

This post dedicated to you, Dom, my beloved step-grandson. I love you.

Mystery

There I was sitting in the diner, sipping my coffee, when it happened.

I could come up with a million explanations as to why I may have had this experience. My state of mind after 4 days of being away from home; chemotherapy treatment; blood-building injections for 3 days after treatment; climbing the mountain behind Todd’s house; meditating on a rock above the world; the magnificence of autumn colors …..

Maybe all of the above, maybe none.

I quietly observed one of the servers/waitresses from afar. She was unaware that I was staring. Simply going about her routine, checking her station orders, fully attentive to the job and the moment. I could almost feel her attentiveness to her own inner thoughts.

However, something even deeper was revealed to me while watching her.

There was an aura surrounding her, in fact, it was enveloping the entire space of the diner. Not only could I sense it, I almost could see it.

It felt and appeared as connective tissue, but translucent tissue that morphed and flowed in wavelike patterns. Like being under clear water and seeing the forms floating in it.

In that moment, I was assured that this web of existence is just that. An intricate, unseen Web of Life. A complete mystery that we will never see with these eyes.

Yet I was graced with the experience to glimpse at it.

In only a few short moments of earth “time” the universe revealed its infinite connective eternity to my consciousness.

Pouf. Tah dah! Here I AM, and I AM That!

The miracle. The Mystery. In a diner of all places.

ananda

Tibetan Buddhism (Vajrayana or tantric Buddhism):

The Four Types of Bliss (ānanda) are part of the Sixteen Aspects (ṣoḍaśākārā) of Gnosis (jñāna) in terms of conventional reality.

  1. the bliss of the mind (cittānanda),
  2. the bliss of the body (kāyānanda),
  3. the bliss of speech (vāg-ānanda),
  4. the bliss of gnosis (jāñānanda).

Google Books: The Inner Kalacakratantra: A Buddhist Tantric View of the Individual

Ananda is a Sanskrit word I learned about back in the day when studied with my teacher, Gail, for my initial yoga teacher training. I understood the word to mean Pure Joy or Bliss or Absolute Happiness.

The word, Ananda, was first introduced to me in the context of Sat Chit Ananda (Truth, Consciousness, Bliss), a Sanskrit expression of the Absolute state of Being – or even the word God could be fitting.

When my friend, Nancy, shared this photo with me this morning, it was this word, Ananda, that I decided was the perfect description for the expression the dogs were exuding in the moment.

How serendipitous to receive this photo today, a very trying day, a day that called upon all of my yogic awareness to recall Ananda’s absolute presence through all of life’s challenges.

I awoke to a new and unusual pain in my chest, upon each breath, a pressure behind my right chest wall. I thought, Oh, this is interesting. What could this be now?

Today being chemo treatment #5 day, I would ready myself for the long drive. Although the pain lessened with each hour, my husband reaffirmed the importance of telling my oncologist about this new pain development.

Unfortunately, the Oncologist said a CAT scan would be necessary to rule out a potential blood clot, only as a precautionary measure.

Off we went to the hospital, for a STAT scan reading, a CAT scan with Contrast.

Yikes, Contrast? Although I was warned by the technician exactly what I would “feel” with the contrast, I was not prepared for the actual experience.

“Okay, it’s going to go fast” she warned, “you’ll feel hot, taste metal in your mouth, and feel like you’re urinating, but you’re not. You may get nauseous or vomit.”

Oh, how delightful, I thought, as I tensed every muscle in my body awaiting the surge. (This was after she stabbed me several times before finding a vein).

Now comes the hot surge. My imagination went haywire. Hot lava is being pushed into my heart, I’m going to explode from the inside out, this is going to fucking kill me, I thought. I winced at the foul metallic taste in my mouth, and panicked as the imaginary hot piss poured down my legs.

Fuck, calm down, I’m going to be okay. I’m going to be okay, I’m going to be okay. I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay. I tried to convince myself.

Then, the picture. I imagined the picture. I conjured the image of those dog expressions in my mind. I remembered the idea, Ananda. Quite remarkably, my awareness shifted. I knew I would be okay. I said the words, “I AM OKAY“.

And, of course, I was okay. But it could have gone so much worse had I let my imagination take me down the path of doom.

Later, the technician gave me the news, “It’s negative.”

Thank you, Nancy and Gary. You and your beloved dogs carried me through the day.

Photo Credit: Nancy and Gary Mahon

what is truth?

This memory I’m about to share probably occurred about 51-53 years ago.

As a 6 to 8-year-old girl I would often watch the black and white TV set with Mom.

There was a movie, a Nazi story. I have no recall what movie it was.

I’ll set the scene as I remember it:

Nazi soldiers are looking for escaped prisoners in a convent. The nuns had hidden a bunch of folks somewhere within the convent property. A soldier is interrogating one of the nuns.

He begins to yell at her, and he slaps her really hard across the face with his hand.

I BURST INTO TEARS.

Now, as a child of this age I had a very cozy, middle income kind of cultural upbringing. There was no trauma, abuse, or anything that I could have identified with at that time that would have reactivated such a harsh emotional reaction to this (subtle, by today’s standards) act of violence.  I was sobbing. Holding back the uncontrollable emotion and tears as much as I could, but I was unable to continue watching the movie. I remember that Mom consoled me.

If Mom were still here, I’d ask her if she had any recollection of the incident. But mom passed last year and she had dementia. So her memory wouldn’t have been very helpful.

Why did that particular incident bring up so much agony and despair for me at that age?

Thinking about this today, it leads me to contemplate:

  • Is our consciousness REALLY inside our brain?
  • Is our consciousness more accurately outside of our brain which would allow access to more than this dimension, this realm, this lifetime, this world?
  • When we’re children, just prior to the unavoidable fact of cultural indoctrination, aren’t we more deeply connected to the reality of our True Conscious Being?

Here’s another childhood memory. About 49-50 years ago, I had an experience while walking home from the school bus up. I’d walk up the hill on Johanna Lane every day, but on this day I had a very sudden moment’s awareness. It was a cognitive sense of being AWARE of more than my little persona, a KNOWING that I WAS ACTUALLY AWARE of MY OWN AWARENESS. How could a 10-year-old process that? I didn’t. I simply remember a feeling as if I had something inside that was more than I could understand. And I liked the feeling. I had something special inside. I became aware of awareness itself just by being quiet, watching my feet take each single step by step along the road’s dark, wet, leafy pavement (it was Fall), and like a Zen meditation, IT appeared, it showed ITSELF, unexpectedly. I received a GIFT.

I would love to hear of any childhood experiences that any readers may have had which reveals a moments’ access to a more open truth of conscious awareness. Please do share ……

I’ll end with a beautiful piece about Truth from one of my favorite Zen masters:  

Most people think that they are basically truthful

But when you look at it for a given day,

How do I embody the truth of being?

Well, you start by telling the truth all the time,

Okay great,

What is the truth then?

What seems to be true for you?

You could look at it as being totally honest all the time

Never deceptive

Never deceiving

Not twisting the sentence where you’re not being completely honest

When you really look at this, even for a single day, you will probably be surprised, maybe even shocked by how often you find yourself shading truths, whether out of fear or out of subtle or overt deception (because you have a fear of being real, being exposed)

There’s hundreds of reason why you might not tell the truth

What is truth then?

It’s not just mere opinion.

It is not unloading your judgements on somebody.

That’s not telling the truth.

It’s more about being deeply and precisely honest, and being very open to having your truth change.

Someone else may inform you. It might alter what’s true for you.

As human beings we clutch on to what we think is true, and when we do state it we state it with a fair amount of defensiveness. So we’re often in a kind of competition, even in the most seemingly casual conversation. You will often notice a quiet, well cultured competition of ideas going on, or just a complete lack of listening. In the average conversation, usually each person is waiting for a gap to jump in and say what they want. This is common in conversation. In a truth sense, conversation is listening to what might be true in any situation. Unless you listen, you’re not going to get anywhere.

No this is not very esoteric, but it’s demanding, it’s real, kind of where the rubber hits the road.

We never like to admit to ourselves when we’re lying. We think we’re doing it for their sake.

If you have a little sensitivity, you can say something truthful or honest without being so overt.

If you want to really start to embody some of your deepest realizations of being, start by telling the truth all the time.

Will there be consequences?  Yes.

How am I delivering the truth? Am I saying what’s really true? Or am I insisting on the truth?

If you get lots of negative feedback on your truth telling, examine how am I delivering this truth, how insistent am I, or am I very simply being honest and real?

One of the ways human beings manipulate each other is by shading the truth.

It’s hard to manipulate somebody when you’re totally honest.

This practice of truth will transform your life. You can’t say how, until you do it.

You can’t control how it will work out.

How could you possibly embody the enlightened condition and be anything less than truthful?

Your experience of being tends to become richer, deeper, more profound, more connected with your human relative life. That inner private space of being and outer human existence are no longer felt as two things, that illusion that there are two things. It’s actually ONE thing.

The more truthful you are, the deeper your sense of connection becomes. That exquisite feeling of spontaneous balanced flow feeling, all of you together, your internal division has come together. If you want to be divided, tell lies. You will feel conflicted inside. Sometimes overtly and sometimes very subtle.

Truth is a unifier. It brings the force of your psychology, your emotions together.

When it’s just truth, there’s something inside of you that comes deeply together.

This is not a direct translation of the YouTube recording. It is my paraphrased excerpts from Adyashanti’s talk titled, ‘What is Truth?

Plasma

“Fixed constructs keep us from experiencing the fluidity of reality which contains the abundance and connections that we long for on this journey.  You must ask yourselves in each moment, What am I programming?” Jenny Schiltz
 
My contemplation in the garden was insightful today.

I felt the plasma-like substance that Jenny Schiltz talks about in her recent blog post.  Yes, indeed. I do agree, this plasma is programmable.

But this is what I saw today:

This plasma is YOU and ME.  (you can substitute the word God for plasma if you prefer)

It is the very fascia of our being and all of what we perceive as planet Earth.

Who programs this plasma? YOU and ME.

Our thoughts program the plasma.

Think of a fractal. The way it is infinitely the same above and below, a spiraling infinity of as above so below, but there’s really no separation of above and below. We just can’t see above and below.

We only see the level of our own conscious awareness in each moment – which is reflected into the plasma that we perceive as outside of us.

But this plasma is already programmed for eons to hide the reality of this fluid movement of energy so that we are unaware, unconscious, and disbelieving of its power within each of us.

Can we un-program our plasma, or re-program it?

The infinite layers of stuck and programmed ideas, beliefs, and indoctrinated behaviors is the plasma that’s playing the current movie feature called Life on Earth.

YOU and I create this.

How did I envision this today?

I witnessed the natural behaviors of the living things;

Kale grown from tiny seedlings
Ants creating pathways through the dirt
Deep-rooted grass weeds, so hard to pull
Soft clover yielding easily to my touch.

IT knows. Life showed me. IT pointed directly to the nature of reality that I AM, and I listened.

Simultaneously, I felt the burning pain in my right breast from the Shingles virus, a condition I’ve manifested over the past several months. 

This stinging pain said to me,
You are transforming, Janet. You are always becoming and always being. Forever connected to truth, even when you don’t see it clearly. This body will only show you what your mind thinks. Good or bad.  It will always mirror your thoughts.

I AM plasma.

meditation

so busy
doing this, doing that
mind flutter
going here, going there
distractions
ooooh yes, ooooh no
The month has been kind of hectic, and I’ve lapsed in my precious quiet sitting time.
So today, I took the time to sit in awareness …… of awareness.

“It is more useful and certainly easier  to think of meditation as the art of acknowledging what is already present. This can happen when you’re sitting in meditation, which is great, but you can also do it at any time. It takes only a few seconds to notice that awareness and quiet are always and already the background of every experience. Start with little moments of meditation – ten seconds, fifteen seconds – and repeat them during the day. Gradually do nothing but this acknowledgement practice for two, ten, twenty seconds, whatever- but do not turn it into a battle, and do not turn it into something that is frustrating or makes you feel defeated. These small moments of meditation can change what you are noticing. In a certain sense, you will be changing your consciousness, opening and beginning to observe and feel and sense into – become sensitive tothe sacred and the timeless. It may or may not start out that way the first time you do it, but the sacred and the timeless are always and already present. All we need to do is take a moment to notice, and that is what meditation is.”

excerpt from the most important thing, Adyashanti (italics and bold are mine)