what is truth?

This memory I’m about to share probably occurred about 51-53 years ago.

As a 6 to 8-year-old girl I would often watch the black and white TV set with Mom.

There was a movie, a Nazi story. I have no recall what movie it was.

I’ll set the scene as I remember it:

Nazi soldiers are looking for escaped prisoners in a convent. The nuns had hidden a bunch of folks somewhere within the convent property. A soldier is interrogating one of the nuns.

He begins to yell at her, and he slaps her really hard across the face with his hand.

I BURST INTO TEARS.

Now, as a child of this age I had a very cozy, middle income kind of cultural upbringing. There was no trauma, abuse, or anything that I could have identified with at that time that would have reactivated such a harsh emotional reaction to this (subtle, by today’s standards) act of violence.  I was sobbing. Holding back the uncontrollable emotion and tears as much as I could, but I was unable to continue watching the movie. I remember that Mom consoled me.

If Mom were still here, I’d ask her if she had any recollection of the incident. But mom passed last year and she had dementia. So her memory wouldn’t have been very helpful.

Why did that particular incident bring up so much agony and despair for me at that age?

Thinking about this today, it leads me to contemplate:

  • Is our consciousness REALLY inside our brain?
  • Is our consciousness more accurately outside of our brain which would allow access to more than this dimension, this realm, this lifetime, this world?
  • When we’re children, just prior to the unavoidable fact of cultural indoctrination, aren’t we more deeply connected to the reality of our True Conscious Being?

Here’s another childhood memory. About 49-50 years ago, I had an experience while walking home from the school bus up. I’d walk up the hill on Johanna Lane every day, but on this day I had a very sudden moment’s awareness. It was a cognitive sense of being AWARE of more than my little persona, a KNOWING that I WAS ACTUALLY AWARE of MY OWN AWARENESS. How could a 10-year-old process that? I didn’t. I simply remember a feeling as if I had something inside that was more than I could understand. And I liked the feeling. I had something special inside. I became aware of awareness itself just by being quiet, watching my feet take each single step by step along the road’s dark, wet, leafy pavement (it was Fall), and like a Zen meditation, IT appeared, it showed ITSELF, unexpectedly. I received a GIFT.

I would love to hear of any childhood experiences that any readers may have had which reveals a moments’ access to a more open truth of conscious awareness. Please do share ……

I’ll end with a beautiful piece about Truth from one of my favorite Zen masters:  

Most people think that they are basically truthful

But when you look at it for a given day,

How do I embody the truth of being?

Well, you start by telling the truth all the time,

Okay great,

What is the truth then?

What seems to be true for you?

You could look at it as being totally honest all the time

Never deceptive

Never deceiving

Not twisting the sentence where you’re not being completely honest

When you really look at this, even for a single day, you will probably be surprised, maybe even shocked by how often you find yourself shading truths, whether out of fear or out of subtle or overt deception (because you have a fear of being real, being exposed)

There’s hundreds of reason why you might not tell the truth

What is truth then?

It’s not just mere opinion.

It is not unloading your judgements on somebody.

That’s not telling the truth.

It’s more about being deeply and precisely honest, and being very open to having your truth change.

Someone else may inform you. It might alter what’s true for you.

As human beings we clutch on to what we think is true, and when we do state it we state it with a fair amount of defensiveness. So we’re often in a kind of competition, even in the most seemingly casual conversation. You will often notice a quiet, well cultured competition of ideas going on, or just a complete lack of listening. In the average conversation, usually each person is waiting for a gap to jump in and say what they want. This is common in conversation. In a truth sense, conversation is listening to what might be true in any situation. Unless you listen, you’re not going to get anywhere.

No this is not very esoteric, but it’s demanding, it’s real, kind of where the rubber hits the road.

We never like to admit to ourselves when we’re lying. We think we’re doing it for their sake.

If you have a little sensitivity, you can say something truthful or honest without being so overt.

If you want to really start to embody some of your deepest realizations of being, start by telling the truth all the time.

Will there be consequences?  Yes.

How am I delivering the truth? Am I saying what’s really true? Or am I insisting on the truth?

If you get lots of negative feedback on your truth telling, examine how am I delivering this truth, how insistent am I, or am I very simply being honest and real?

One of the ways human beings manipulate each other is by shading the truth.

It’s hard to manipulate somebody when you’re totally honest.

This practice of truth will transform your life. You can’t say how, until you do it.

You can’t control how it will work out.

How could you possibly embody the enlightened condition and be anything less than truthful?

Your experience of being tends to become richer, deeper, more profound, more connected with your human relative life. That inner private space of being and outer human existence are no longer felt as two things, that illusion that there are two things. It’s actually ONE thing.

The more truthful you are, the deeper your sense of connection becomes. That exquisite feeling of spontaneous balanced flow feeling, all of you together, your internal division has come together. If you want to be divided, tell lies. You will feel conflicted inside. Sometimes overtly and sometimes very subtle.

Truth is a unifier. It brings the force of your psychology, your emotions together.

When it’s just truth, there’s something inside of you that comes deeply together.

This is not a direct translation of the YouTube recording. It is my paraphrased excerpts from Adyashanti’s talk titled, ‘What is Truth?

morning meditation

Light moves in and out water dropping from sky

It looks like rain 

but it’s just the wind shaking water off the leaves

I’m awake to see through my eyes

Quietly

I’m Aware

I contemplate, Where am I?  …..

Am I Really?

Until I know that

I know nothing

It’s just seeing trees, rain, birds, sunlight, out my window

Nothing is what I think it is

It’s beautiful

Everything is so much more than what
I think it is

But really I know nothing

Somehow I know everything 

meditation

so busy
doing this, doing that
mind flutter
going here, going there
distractions
ooooh yes, ooooh no
The month has been kind of hectic, and I’ve lapsed in my precious quiet sitting time.
So today, I took the time to sit in awareness …… of awareness.

“It is more useful and certainly easier  to think of meditation as the art of acknowledging what is already present. This can happen when you’re sitting in meditation, which is great, but you can also do it at any time. It takes only a few seconds to notice that awareness and quiet are always and already the background of every experience. Start with little moments of meditation – ten seconds, fifteen seconds – and repeat them during the day. Gradually do nothing but this acknowledgement practice for two, ten, twenty seconds, whatever- but do not turn it into a battle, and do not turn it into something that is frustrating or makes you feel defeated. These small moments of meditation can change what you are noticing. In a certain sense, you will be changing your consciousness, opening and beginning to observe and feel and sense into – become sensitive tothe sacred and the timeless. It may or may not start out that way the first time you do it, but the sacred and the timeless are always and already present. All we need to do is take a moment to notice, and that is what meditation is.”

excerpt from the most important thing, Adyashanti (italics and bold are mine)

 

 

 

as the world turns

“If you live for the things of this world, that’s all you’re gunna get”

Lavette Hawkins

sitting in padmasana, while floating in my aerial hammock

My morning meditation ensues

intuitive sense of being inwardly stable at the core

while my physical energy form is spinning around a quiet and still inner axis

I can intuit feeling how the earth must feel wobbling on its axis

I ask myself, what is true?

I sit in Silence

no audible answer arrives

just an awareness that I exist in this moment

is that not enough?

with clarity that the awareness of this moment is beyond my understanding

I remind myself that I can’t see anything for what it really is

but there is a strong pull to look deeply at ALL relationships today (after all, it’s 12/12)

the One and the Other, the circle and the diameter, the Self and God

and I practice the last four stages of Patanjali’s 8-fold path:

Pratyahara, withdrawal of the senses

Dharana, fixing the mind to a single point

Dhyana, focused meditation where the subject and object are fully aware of each other

Samadhi, subject and object recognize each other as the same, and become One

I rest with an inner knowing that there is nothing more valuable than this thing we call Life,

even in our misunderstandings, our seeming errors, our untrue beliefs, and our non-life-enhancing actions

even these mistakes are of value although we can’t comprehend it from this perspective

I remember and re-cognize that it’s the only thing that Exists (this thing we call Life),

and that it is without beginning and without end

because the only REAL relationship is Life eternally experiencing itself as Life

“Live your life. If you have a gospel of truth, share it. And if it is true others will hear it. Be the good shepherd, and those that are supposed to hear your voice will hear it.”

Derrick, global witness

 

 

Emptiness and Luminosity

Seven days of silence, a retreat lead by Adyashanti entitled, “The Embodiment of Insight”.

This was an opportunity to absorb so many pearls of wisdom evoked from the daily dharma talks, the six meditation sittings per day, the beautiful natural surroundings, and 270 beings sharing 3 meals per day, observing together both the stillness and the movement – in total Silence.

Some Pearls of wisdom worth sharing:

Always look inward to the depth of intuitive knowing. The learning comes from what’s evoked within you. The teacher should never actually have an answer to your question.

We are always Being, always Becoming.

Truth is transcendent of the opposites, but can express itself through it.

We’re all attracted to the light of the fire, but unaware of the vast open space around us.

When you meditate, Sit Tall, but let the breath be soft and easy.

Recognize that the dynamic pull of the unknown (God) is not only One Way. It goes both ways. IT needs us as much as we need IT.

There is no separation. The other side of joy is sorrow. The other side of suffering is peace. The other side of light is dark. One will always contain the other.

In the Zen tradition, nothing is explained. It is left to your own experience. I imagine that is why this teacher, Adyashanti, became such a master of dialogue and imagery, to give our rational mind something to understand. 

Meditation toolbox: Look at your thoughts with Kindness, Gentleness, Compassion.

How to go ‘all the way’ through to liberation? Never deny the truth of what you actually and always are.

In the eye of the hurricane: the still point is not separate from the chaos.

BE STILL LIKE A HUMMINGBIRD, (Henry Miller): A title that’s a perfect analogy for the paradox of life.

Deep spirituality begins when we come to realize we don’t know.

This life is going to go by in a flash. Do something for yourself; Take one moment, step back, take a breath, and take it all in. 

Namaste my fellow beings. In deep love I share these simple realizations.

the truth is timeless

“When you feed yourself food for the mind, be careful where you eat.

There’s very little today on television that’s wholesome, especially with all the symbolism behind it. But If you will learn this symbolism, that’s passed down from Mercury and Hermetics here, and alchemy, then that magic no longer works on you. When you see how the trick is done, its no longer a trick, its no longer magic, it just becomes a slight of hand.

That word sign is a LOGO. In the beginning was the word; that word is LOGO. The symbols, the signs.

That’s why I keep telling you, LEARN THEM, LEARN THEM, LEARN THEM. You won’t ever understand anything you “see” until you understand the meanings behind these symbols, and it’s so in depth, it’s something a person must do for themselves. You keep training yourself until it becomes second nature.

Mastering a thing. Keep doing it until you perfect it. (Kung Fu)

You keep meditating.

You keep learning the symbology.

And you keep on keepin’ on.

To be a wise, ascended master, you must know all SIGNS”

Lavette Hawkins

 

A classic kick ass song …..  still true:

 

Ajna

“You’re the spirit in the magic circle
You’re the yoke in the egg
And you have to come out of yourself
And you do that through the pineal gland

I don’t want to get involved in politics
I want to teach astrology and alchemy because to me that is the greatest gift I can give you because it’s the tools that help empower you on a personal level.
The bible is a friggen alchemy and astrology book that tells you how to live in this world!
How to take up your cross, understand who you are, and follow the lamb wherever he goes;
MEDITATION, going within.
When you walk in the Kingdom, you realize that sun outside is just like a light in my closet.
Y’all go commit that random act of kindness……”

A Compromise Can Get You Compromised, Lavette Hawkins

 

“The closing of our pineal gland …..

It doesn’t just dumb us down

it limits our access to our higher senses

So we only have this five-sense version of reality

But there are a lot of other higher senses

Max Igan – WhistleBlower Nation – Revolution Radio – June 8th 2018″