Divine mystery

“If there’s no sense of the sacred, then there’s something we’re not paying attention to.”

Adyashanti

When I was a child, about 4 or 5 years old, I developed a fever.

I can actually remember that day. Sitting on the top stair of our new suburbia high ranch home. I recall the sense of being deliriously on fire.

Eventually, I guess the fever subsided but I can’t remember the details.

And then the seizures started. My body would convulse – like electric jolts from the center of my spine out through my legs and arms.

My poor parents thought I was possessed. (It was 1964).

Many doctor visits later, and no conclusive diagnosis, my parents resorted to a hypnotherapist to evaluate me. I remember that day vividly (but this is a story for another forum … ).

Finally …. someone with medical knowledge must have suggested a spinal tap and brain encephalogram …

and the diagnosis was eventually revealed to my parents:

Your child has encephalitis. She must have contracted it from a mosquito bite on your recent family visit to the Jersey shore.

This was the story given to me which would remain in my head for the next 56 years. How I wish I could go back in time and ask the doctors:

“DO YOU THINK MAYBE THE LOAD OF PRE-SCHOOL VACCINATIONS GIVEN TO MY 5-YEAR-OLD SELF MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH SEIZURES AND ENCEPHALITIS?????!!!!”

Recently, I googled the required vaccinations for preschoolers in 1964, and this was listed as the required immunizations:

Smallpox, Diphtheria*, Tetnus*, Pertussis*, Polio (OPV), Measles, Mumps, Rubella (* Given in combination as DTP)

I’ll never know what vaccines I actually received. I have no records. However, I do remember Mom taking me to the school gymnasium to get the dreaded “shot” in the arm.

Actually, the point of this story is not my anger that a childhood vaccination may have caused encephalitis and seizures.

The point is …

Whatever happened to me in 1964 … as awful as it may have looked at the time for my worried sick parents – as horrific it may be that a vaccine potentially could have killed me –

Was the Sacred present even in that life event?

Is the Sacred ever NOT present?

I am finding this line of inquiry helpful, especially now …

It reminds me to pay attention to what is unseen but Always Present.

All things that have been a source of pain, discomfort and disassociation, when brought into service to one power-which is the One Power-will then become vehicles of expression serving a greater purpose.

Marshall Vian Summers

meditation

so busy
doing this, doing that
mind flutter
going here, going there
distractions
ooooh yes, ooooh no
The month has been kind of hectic, and I’ve lapsed in my precious quiet sitting time.
So today, I took the time to sit in awareness …… of awareness.

“It is more useful and certainly easier  to think of meditation as the art of acknowledging what is already present. This can happen when you’re sitting in meditation, which is great, but you can also do it at any time. It takes only a few seconds to notice that awareness and quiet are always and already the background of every experience. Start with little moments of meditation – ten seconds, fifteen seconds – and repeat them during the day. Gradually do nothing but this acknowledgement practice for two, ten, twenty seconds, whatever- but do not turn it into a battle, and do not turn it into something that is frustrating or makes you feel defeated. These small moments of meditation can change what you are noticing. In a certain sense, you will be changing your consciousness, opening and beginning to observe and feel and sense into – become sensitive tothe sacred and the timeless. It may or may not start out that way the first time you do it, but the sacred and the timeless are always and already present. All we need to do is take a moment to notice, and that is what meditation is.”

excerpt from the most important thing, Adyashanti (italics and bold are mine)